Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Ode to the Cold

O, freezing winds from the north, you have the power to change our lives and transform our environment, both indoors and out. You are feared and hated, but you must be respected for the power you wield over us. Who among you would have the ability to transform one of these

Into one of these?

And I implore, how is it that you can make us speak these words to our beloved, "Come on, Baby, light my fire",

And they not provide us with much needed affection, but do this?

Finally, after we have triumphantly embattled you and retreated to the sanctity of our lair, we have the glorious reward that is the bath,

But you have pierced us to the bone and now we hear popping and cracking when we submerge.

You have the power to force us into the market to make purchases and spend our hard-earned money on this

When we don't even have one of these.

O wicked, wicked winter release us from thy grasp and let us live again. We desire to be free, to playest in the fields among the lillies. Permit thy brother, glorious spring, keeper of all things beautiful, to be released from your bonds. Doest this with haste, lest we call upon Beowulf to slay thee, for we are tired of you kicking our arse.


  1. It has been a crazy season, hasn't it? All the more reason to take lots of hot baths!

  2. Sending, hugs, Aloha and sunshine from paradise!!!

  3. Amen. I am with ya. Oh, and this TuTu person, not nice.

  4. Ok, so I'm confused. What do you need the kitty litter for?!! We don't have much snow and ice here in Texas.

  5. I have bad news for you.

    It is only January.

    We have a long ass way to go still....

  6. Rhea,
    You use the cat litter for traction if your tires are spinning. I guess it's a lot cheaper than a tow truck.

  7. Did you see, 40 degrees today?! Holy cow! I'm getting out the summer clothes!

  8. Ha!

    LOVE your top line of your blog column that says "If you don't want it on my blog then don't do it in front of me" Hahahaha!


If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. No need to point out my mistakes, I have family for that.