Wednesday, March 25, 2009

A Note from the Grave and a Question

I went to the thrift store yesterday to look for books. They have a lot of books, I was there an hour and didn't poke through even half of them. They just throw them on the shelves, they don't sort them or censor them or anything so you can find some weird and funny stuff there and, I'm not afraid to say, I dig me some weird and funny.

I picked up a couple of titles that caught my attention, writings I will regale you with in future posts, no doubt, and inside one small paperback, was this note. I found it deep in the middle of the book, close to the spine, typed on a notecard, now yellowed around the edges.

In case you can't read it, it says:
"Hope you both enjoy this as much as we have. Its good stuff too. Sorry my time is spent as I sure could have won a lot more of the tiffs than I did. Love, Dad."

I guess Dad thought that the kid, now grown and married, would read his books after he died and find this note. The kid must not have been too interested in Dad's books because this note probably would have been kept had it been found.

I am glad it wasn't found, because I really like this guy. Not only does he have a great sense of humor, it's a morbid one to boot. Awesome.


Ladieeeees and Gennnnnnntlemen, it's time to play WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE SAID?

You are in line, with your spouse and daughter, to pay at a buffet style restaurant. Your daughter, age 17, orders a cup of coffee as her drink. The lady getting the drinks looks accusingly at her and at you and, with a look of disgust, says to her, "Aren't you too young to be drinking coffee?" As her parent, what would you have said?


  1. first, loved the idea of the note, I am now going to place such notes in some of my books, i'll think of something to say that will frighten the crap out of someone...hopefully the kids!!!

    Re: coffee, now, i hate it when people question my kids, people think its okay to let their kids drink a gallon of cola a day but often question me letting my son drink coffee and my daughter for being a tea a holic...they don't have fizzy pop...I don't see too much wrong with the odd bit of caffiene...

    so i would have said something mean if poss (even though its not usually how i am)...if, so I'd have gone for 'arent you a bit too old/fat/ugly for that outfit/hairstyle'...or if she was looking too good to cuss in this way, i would have gone for the more subtle, 'arent you too busy waiting on us to give us parenting advice...' if I didn't want to be derogatory to her job or appearance, despite her being so to my parenting skills, maybe I'd just ask her where she got her degree in nutritional science for teens...

  2. What an awesome thing to find in a book!

    As for the buffet lady, I probably would have just said something like "Not if her mother doesn't think so"...but I totally would have been wanting to say way more hateful stuff that I instead would mutter under my breath as I walked away.

    So sweet of you to stop by my blog and comment...sorry to have given you the bad news regarding your 17 year old in the process! We fumed for quite awhile over that one!

  3. To the rude server at the buffet restaurant, I would have answered, "Well, you don't serve bourbon here.... so she's gotta drink coffee!"

    Best ... Cass

  4. I love getting old books at Goodwill for decor. I once got a bunch of old hymnals that were over a 100 years old with pealing covers. Good stuff.

  5. oh my god no, she started at about 4 months. :)

    my story: (which I wouldn't have told her, actually when people are like that I tend to "mind your own business" My son's first sitter would give him ice from her diet coke all day when he started teething at about 4 months. then sips of coffee. when he was about a year he and i were at dee's waiting for breakfast. crayons had been eaten, paper ripped, silverware flung, ice spit out, getting frantic I put a little coffee on my spoon and he guzzled it down. this little boy at another table screams "LOOK SHE'S GIVING HIM COFFEE" his infinitely wiser 10 year old sister looks at me, looks at him, shrugs and said "so" and he let it drop. :) at least its not alcohol.

  6. I laughed at Cass's answer.

    I manage a restaurant and our rule of thumb is Don't question the guest. (in front of them anyway)

    I've had parents roll their eyes when kids try to order things not age appropriate and interject and say.

    "No Tommy will not have a Stoli Martini extra dry two olives, he'll have a tall glass of milk"

    Mom mock slaps Tommy on arm.

    And very cool on finding the letter. Makes you wonder what this guys life was like.

  7. Re: the coffee..

    I think I would have sweetly turned to the people behind me and said loudly, "Get your ID's ready--they're carding for coffee." Then I would have insisted that my daughter present her driver's license as proof that she was old enough. Nosy employee would be thrown off guard because there is no stupid age requirement for coffee. Then I would have ordered coffee for myself and presented my ID too. But I sound more evil than you... :)

  8. Very cool note. I love finding stuff like that in old furniture that I restore for clients.

    The coffee thing? LOL I was drinking coffee when I was 9. Seriously.

  9. You don't wanna know what I would have said. I think you can pretty much imagine what it would be. LOL

  10. Love the note you found from the dad in the book! How cool! As far as what I would've said to the waitress/server, "There actually is data and statistics that support 24 oz of coffee a day is healthy...and keeps the body moving along"~ ;)))) ~CC Catherine

  11. I'd calmly say "It's okay."
    I don't like scenes.

    The note - isn't it just wonderful, this leap in time?

  12. I guess at 17, who cares, you know? At there wasn't any Bailey's in it. :-)


If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. No need to point out my mistakes, I have family for that.