Thursday, April 2, 2009

Prude or Vixen?

My youngest daughter, age 17, is a prude. Not just a prude but an ultra prude. I haven't been allowed in a department store dressing room with her since she was 8. I haven't seen her naked since she was 7. Talk of bodily functions? Forget it. If the kid were being rushed to the emergency room in an ambulance, she wouldn't tell the emts the last time she went pooh. I have never heard her fart, ever, I don't think she does. You get the picture.

I took the 2 female sappers-of-my-youth to lunch and during our discussion of books, I said to the eldest, "You wouldn't like that other book I picked up, it had S&M in it."

"What's S&M?"

As I start giving her the watered down, in public, PG-13, generalized definition of sado-masochism, the Prude sticks her fingers in her ears, as usual, and starts, "La la la la."

"Oh, yeah, I saw something like that on the Playboy channel one night," says the Eldest casually.

More "La la la la" from the Prude.

"It was called 'Men In Bondage'."

The Prude's ears perk up and she looks up from her salad, "Men in bondage?" A grinch-like grin forms and there is a definite twinkle in her eye, "I never thought of that!"

Should I be worried? Am I going to come home one day to find the boyfriend shackled to the wall in a makeshift dungeon in my basement? It could be worse, I guess, Em could be the M.


  1. Oh my word. That is funNEE!! I love it!
    Now, if all 17 year olds would be that prudish, we'd have less baby baby mommas.... no? ;)

  2. SO funny, I am The SAME way :)

  3. I wish my daughters freinds were this prudish...they make me blush, my daughter is prudish so far...but give it time...i was a prude until i was 18!!!!!

  4. Don't you love how different siblings can be? My girls are day and night -- or possibly from different planets, not sure.

  5. Being a nurse, I am not prudish in the least. If bodily functions embarrassed me, I'd be out of a job, I think.

    I'm cracking up that hearing about "Men in bondage" is what it took to make her unplug her ears. Funny.

    Better hide your whips and chains, Kim.

  6. That is so funny! My boys share and show everything! Even Tuesday is picking up on the fart contests!

  7. I seriously laughed out loud when I got to the end of this post. She so reminds me of myself at 17. At the same time, my heart is warmed. There's nothing wrong with kids who don't plaster their intimate body parts all over Facebook and who still have a touch of the innocent. It sounds like you've got some good kids.

  8. Yup, you better watch out. You may have started something. LOL

  9. Hahaha! That is GREAT! Love it!


If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. No need to point out my mistakes, I have family for that.